Author Archive

How Flowers and Funerals Got Together

February 24th, 2011

The idea of funeral flowers has had both a practical and a symbolic use for many years.  In the beginning, using flowers and spices were used at a funeral or burial-place as a pleasant way to mask orders. Today, we use funeral flowers as loving tributes to our lost friends.

The History of Flowers & Funerals

Send Funeral Flowers From A Real Local Florist With Flower Shop NetworkIt wasn’t until the 18oo’s that the practice of embalming became a popular practice.  Conservation practices have been done in many cultures for thousands of years, but it is not until the Civil War that embalming become common in the United States. President Lincoln actually became interested in the idea so that Union soldiers could be returned to their loved ones for proper burial.  After the Civil War however, embalming fell out of use, and once again funeral flowers became popular.

In 1914 C. Austin Miles wrote the famous funeral hymn, “In the Garden” which referenced the afterlife being like a garden stroll. This eventually lead funeral homes to develop indoor gardens as the backdrop of the funeral.

Flowers at funerals are also used when it is difficult to know what to say.  People are often at a loss for words in times of grief. Even when the passing is expected, it is sometimes hard to know what to say.

Why Sending Funeral Flowers Is So Important

  • Sending flowers is a wonderful way to express one’s sympathy and compassion for the family, and show respect for the deceased.
  • Funeral flowers often are meant to show one’s  love, and support for the family.
  • Personalized funeral flowers can often spark happy memories of those close to the departed.
  • Flowers also have a symbolic use in that they can create a warm and comforting feeling during the funeral.
  • Flowers can be a great comfort to those close to the deceased and create a special memory for loved ones to recall long after the funeral.

Related Articles:

Personalized & Creative Funeral Flowers
In Lieu Of Flowers Doesn’t Mean No Funeral Flowers
Funeral Flower Etiquette

Visitation: Healing For Everyone

December 28th, 2010

Memories Of A Dear Friend!

My friend, Patty Chaffin, died a few years ago after a long battle with cancer. Let me tell you a little bit about Patty. Patty and I met at a Rotary Youth Leadership Awards Camp (RYLA). Patty was this beautiful redhead with a loud voice and even louder laugh. She was vibrant and full of energy. Everyone who met Patty instantly liked her and most of the time she instantly liked them.

We were both counselors and eventually after a couple of years, Patty became the head counselor. She was fabulous and the teenagers loved her. Patty discovered during this time she had cancer. She came back the next year as head counselor with wigs of every color in the rainbow.

At the end of camp, we have what is called RYLA’s Own. This is where the kids in teams or individually do cheers, songs, skits or whatever to describe their experience at camp. It is amazing to see what these kids come up with and most are outright hilarious. Justin, one of our youth who happened to work part-time at a pharmacy, came up to the microphone. I thought, here we go, this will be funny. It wasn’t. Justin spoke from the heart. He told the group that if they didn’t realize it Patty didn’t feel great. As a matter of fact, her health outlook was pretty grim. This sixteen year old boy with tears running down his cheeks thanked Patty for her positive outlook and energetic passion. There was not a dry eye at RYLA.

Visitation: Honoring The True Spirit.

Okay, that was a great story. What is the point and what does this have to do with visitation? Well, Patty eventually died. However, Patty had one of the most magnificent visitations I have ever seen. Patty wanted a party and that is what she had!

Continue reading “Visitation: Healing For Everyone” »

Merry Griefmas! Working Through Grief During The Holidays

December 1st, 2010

The holidays are fast approaching. While Thanksgiving and Christmas for most are anticipated with joy and cheer, for some, it is dreaded. Their loved one has died and they just aren’t sure how everything is going to work this year, or if they even want it to work.

My father died suddenly the morning after Thanksgiving. The thought of Christmas was just mind numbing to say the least. I had young nieces and nephews so we knew we had to do something somewhat normal, even though there was nothing normal about it. Let me give you some advice about how we coped that Christmas.

CRY IF YOU NEED TOO! It is okay to let others know you are going through something so difficult and, by being free with your emotions, encourages your family that it is okay to openly grieve. The day will be tough, be upfront about that. You just might find out that they are experiencing some of the same feelings. Let them know that you don’t expect the perfect holiday. Just because you and your loved ones have always done the same thing for Christmas, Hanukkah, or Thanksgiving doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it that way. Just do what you feel comfortable doing.

For example, we used to celebrate with both sets of my grandparents separately. We chose just to have one Christmas celebration at one house. It actually made it much easier on my mother and on everyone else. With that being said, keep the traditions that are most dear to your heart. You may experience some comfort and have fond memories. My family always goes to Mass on Christmas Eve. It is always a magical experience for me. And even though I was raw with emotion, I could feel my father’s spirit surrounding me at that service. However, if you don’t feel like you can attend services this year, then don’t.

Continue reading “Merry Griefmas! Working Through Grief During The Holidays” »

Eight Cemetery Monument Materials

November 4th, 2010

Cemetery monuments have been used for thousands of years.  Typically people would use whatever natural material happened to be available locally.  Often this was whatever local rock was available or wood which was not very durable since it would rot very quickly.  People today have more options than ever.

It is no longer necessary to pick the cemetery monument material based solely on proximity to your town.  Today, people can pick the best and most durable material available.  For many the choice is bronze and granite.

Throughout  the years, several different types of materials have been used to create monuments. Despite their obvious deficiencies, some of these materials are still used today.  Sandstone, limestone, granite, marble, and others have been used for generations. Several of these gravestone materials lack durability or accessibility.

This article will highlight the various types of materials used in cemetery memorials and will explain the advantages of each material.

Granite

Granite is by far the most popular headstone material type today.  Granite comes in a multitude of colors including grays and pinks. It also has a wide variety of textures.  Granite is one of the strongest natural materials with a durability that lasts for generations. In fact granite is so hard that it is difficult to carve by hand.  Granite is very popular today because of its sturdiness.

Marble

Marble is another type of monument material that is still popular today.  There are several types of marble.  Marble comes in a wide range of qualities which means that some materials are quite permanent while others are not.  White marble, for example, is  a beautiful material but may eventually develop a black film over its surface.

Cast and Wrought Iron

Cast iron grave markers were popular during the Victorian era and have survived for generations.  Their not so lucky counterparts, wrought iron grave markers still stand but many have succumbed to rust or live in an eroded state.
Continue reading “Eight Cemetery Monument Materials” »

Cemetery Monument and Headstone Options

September 28th, 2010

Planning a funeral seems like a difficult task.  With all different types, shapes, sizes, flower placement styles and cremation burial options available it can seem impossible to select a memorial that is meant to enshrine your loved one’s memory for eternity.  In the next several sections, different types and styles of cemetery monuments have been described that should make selection during a difficult time easier.

Companion Monuments

Companion headstones usually sit on a family plot and are meant to memorialize more than one person.  While these monuments are typically meant for two people, they can be enlarged to allow for the names of more family members.

Companion headstone with vase and traditional companion headstoneCompanion monuments can come in an upright or flat style.  We will mention all the flat, slanted and bevel styles further down in this article.  When thinking of purchasing this monument, consider whether or not you would like to be able to place flowers on the headstone.

There are many flower options that exist for companion monuments.  One such option is an interconnecting vase between the two sides of the companion headstone.  Another option is to have one large double monument with flower vases on either side.  There can also be an inlaid space at the top of the monument that allows for flowers to be easily placed on top.

A final option could be a monument with no designated space for flowers and one could purchase a wire flower saddle.  The wire flower saddle straddles the cemetery monument at the top and allows for easy flower placement on an upright headstone.

Individual Monuments

Individual MonumentsIndividual monuments are meant to be memorials for one person.  As with companion headstones, individual markers come in flat or upright styles and have flower placement options.

There can be two separate vases along either side of the  individual marker, an indented space can be made available at the top of the headstone, or a wire flower saddle can be placed upon the individual gravestone.

Individual headstones have space on them for a design, the name and dates of your loved one.

 

Bevel, Slant, and Flat Monuments

Bevel and slant headstonesBevel and slant cemetery monuments are meant to sit at the head or foot of a grave.  A bevel monument is flat and a slanted monument sits upright at a slight angle.  The design of the bevel or slant monument is to allow one to read the marker when approaching the grave memorial.

These headstones can be small enough for just one name or large enough to be a companion monument.  What makes the slant and bevel headstone different from a traditional flat marker is that a base is located beneath the monument.

Flat headstoneThis allows the marker to be lifted, making it more visible and also keeping lawnmowers back. Flower vases can also be placed at one side of these markers to allow for convenient flower placement.

This type of monument is large enough to put an engraving of a small design, as well as the  full name and dates of your loved one.

Flat markers, like slanted and bevel cemetery monuments can be small enough for just one name or enlarged to be a companion style.

They are similar to slant and bevel styles except that there is no base located beneath the monument. They are at ground level allowing lawnmowers to mow over them.

Continue reading “Cemetery Monument and Headstone Options” »

Cremation Urns – Styles and Uses

July 9th, 2010

Cremation urns are containers (similar to vases) that hold the cremains (ashes) of your loved one after cremation. They are typically used as  keepsake urns, but are also made for burial uses as well. Urns can be intricately designed, embellished with etchings and colors, or they can be simple and elegant.

Metal Cremation UrnIf you are opting to store the ashes of your deceased loved one in an urn, it is an important decision to think about. This vessel will carry the cremains of someone very dear to your heart, so you want to find something that would honor their life. Also known as “keepsake urns,” cremation urns are typically given to the closest relative to guard and protect.

Styles of Urns

Cremation urns are made in a variety of sizes, shapes, colors and designs. You can honor your fallen soldier, child, and even family pet with specialized cremation urns. The urns are made out of a variety of materials, such as ceramic, rich woods (like maple, cherry and mahogany), glass, leather, metal and stone.

There are many skilled artisans who handcraft special keepsake urns for your loved ones. If you wish, you could find a company who will customize the urn to help you better remember and honor those who have passed on. Most artists will create (time and money willing) any type/color/shape of urn to fulfill your special needs.

The newest trends for urns use natural materials that are not harmful to the environment. There are even biodegradable urns that can be tossed into a lake or ocean, where the ashes will eventually disperse.

Continue reading “Cremation Urns – Styles and Uses” »

What Are Cremation Services?

July 8th, 2010

Planning a funeral for a loved one is not an easy task. The process can be especially emotional when you are unsure of how to fulfill the wishes of your friend or family member. This is especially true when a family member requests cremation as a substitute for a more traditional burial service.

Many people are choosing cremation over a more traditional burial. Yet, their loved ones have no clue how to plan a cremation service in a way that honors the deceased or what cremation entails. You may feel lost and alone when it comes to cremation or planning the service, but you are not. If you are faced with this daunting issue, I urge you to read further for tips and traditions related to cremation services.

What Constitutes A Cremation Service?

If your loved one has requested cremation, there are many ways to honor their remains. Cremation services have become a renowned and respectable way to celebrate the life of a loved one who has passed away.

After the cremation, which is a precise process performed by specialized individuals, the ashes (also known as cremains) are delivered to the designated funeral home. Common ceremonial activities involving the ashes include scattering, burial or placement in a mausoleum, and presentation of the ashes in a cremation urn to the family.

Cremation Memorial Services

The most common ceremony associated with cremations are memorial services. This service is a way for loved ones to grieve the life lost, to say goodbye, or to celebrate the life lived. When it comes to a memorial service, you will want to think about how the service can best honor the life of your loved one.  During the memorial service, you can display pictures and/or items that honor and celebrate the life of the deceased. Cremation urns are are often displayed during this service.  As with a traditional burial service, many people choose to send funeral flowers and plants as a way to offer their condolences at this service. This type of cremation service is typically performed at a religious location or a place with special significance to the deceased.

Continue reading “What Are Cremation Services?” »

Grave Blankets

January 5th, 2010

Everything You Need To Know About Grave Blankets

Grave blankets, also referred to as cemetery grave blankets, are decorative coverings for the gravesite. In the same way that casket sprays decorate a casket at the funeral, grave blankets decorate the gravesite at the cemetery.

Grave blankets are traditionally made of evergreens (such as pine) and decorated with accents like baby’s breath, ribbons, bows, etc. Grave blankets come in many sizes. The smallest of these, often referred to as grave pillows, are more compact and reside near the headstone.

Areas Where Grave Blankets Are Popular

Grave blankets, though not traditional to any part of the country, are an American tradition that has taken root in northernmost states. Grave blankets are most common in states with colder winters. The most popular locations for grave blankets are Michigan, Ohio, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Illinois and New York.

Even in areas that do not suffer harsh winters, grave blankets are a popular winter cemetery decoration because most fresh flowers cannot tolerate the cold. Live evergreens in grave blankets provide a fresh alternative whereas otherwise the only options are silk flowers, artificial flowers, or no decorations at all.

The Proper Time To Use Grave Blankets

Grave blankets are typically used in the late fall and throughout the winter. Though each cemetery is different, most allow grave blankets to be displayed from November through late March or early April. During this season, Christmas grave blankets are popular.

As this season wanes, grave blankets for other holidays are selected. These may include a grave blanket for Mother’s Day, the anniversary of the person’s death, the birthday of the deceased, and other occasions.

Other Helpful Information About Grave Blankets

 

Learn how to make a grave blanket.